Lets Keep ‘Look’-ing For What Matters!

punjab police
How can you fool the police? Very easy, become one of them. That is how some terrorists could enter the jail to help their colleagues escape, fooling the Punjab Police. Is it so easy or does it have something to do with the Punjab Police itself. If you are thinking about the competence of Police, no I did not mean that, I have no doubt that they are as equally competent as any of their counterparts in India. What I’m talking about is their appearance. Have you ever noticed how similar all Punjab police personnel are? To make you notice that, let me take your memories to the only Sikh news anchor of NDTV, Amitoj Singh. What makes him stand out is his turban color coordinated with all his other pieces of clothing. Otherwise if you cover yourself all over with clothes and what ever little is left with hair, how can you be differentiated! Of course, you would say there is also the question of physical features. Notice again this doesn’t work so well with Punjab Police either. The image comes to your mind when you think of them is high(tall), hairy, hefty, etc……… Now imagine how easy it would have been for terrorists to imitate them, with similar clothes, hair and also the turban. I can validate my claim further, have you seen the most notorious of this lot of terrorists who escaped, if not ,then you need to rewind or see a old newspaper clipping. Not realizing the consequences and thinking he will differentiate himself, he got his beard and hair cut. But this is what made it so easy to recognize him and he landed back to the place he ran from ! Though I know, many might want to discard my theory as absurd, because then we’ll have to settle the problem of who takes credit for the arrest. Having said all this, please don’t think this is always a disadvantage. Have you ever seen a Sunny Deol movie. He has always preferred to be casted in the role of a Punjab police officer, before he flies to a foreign land chasing what his job demands. There, what gives him a disadvantage in his homeland turns to a visible advantage. He is the only one visible everywhere, even when playing a cameo. Even Daniel Craig can suffer from a case of mistaken identity in a James Bond movie, but not him. When the world proudly says that an Indian with a turban can be found everywhere, it is because his appearance which really makes him stand out.

A Leopard Offering Us An Opportunity To Leap

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What did the leopard think, that he will not be spotted even though all the while he was wearing spotted. We humans have domesticated everything and as this leopard did not show any sign of domestication, there was no alternative. We always think in black and white, it’s either my way or no way. We can gang up and be very decisive, especially when it comes to showing our anguish. Why give a chance to the wild life officials to tranquillize the animal, when we have the perfect opportunity to vent our feeling without exhausting our brains! We also know better than to use and waste our brain when others are already doing the tedious task of thinking, and who can doubt the fact that in such a big crowd gathered to annihilate the poor creature, at least someone would be using their brain. But how did the leopard land up here amongst this mob of angry young men, on his way to the heavenly abode. I don’t believe the theory that he lost his way, if you do then try leaving your cat miles away and find her waiting for you when you reach home (What you don’t have a cat! Be innovative, find a neighbor with a cat!). The explanation that he wandered to find food appears to be more plausible. This incident has happened after 8th of November, I just hope it has nothing to do with the de-monetization policy. Oh how foolish of me! There could definitely not have been a connection, otherwise the opposition would have surely made it their priority to make it an issue. One more death due to demonetization and most would have believed it also, leaving no reason whatsoever to introspect what should be done differently to save the census of wild animals from depleting. Education for the masses is a distant dream, when we have no time away from politics, but surely the wildlife department staff can be trained to be quick in it’s response to help the straying wild animals witness some more hell here.

Please Don’t Take A ‘Note’!

You know what the two most dirtiest things in the world are? Money and Door handles. They are believed to have the maximum germs. But why are we cribbing, when as part of the ‘Swachh Bharat Abhiyan’, Modi ji has told us to get rid of the dirty notes. I know the door handles are gonna be taken care of next. Or wait a second! Modi ji is too far-sighted, he already knows that in India, we have been using notes to open doors. So no notes means no more doors. What about votes? Notes and votes rhyme better than notes and doors, don’t they! Are people going to lose the incentive to vote now or is there going to be a new-found excitement to vote with clean hands. Do you understand now why opposition parties are cribbing? in addition to notes they also seem to have lost all hope for votes!
And as far as our favorite sport ‘Politics’ is concerned, it has also been taken care of by de-monetization. By the time de-monetization is over, the economy would have slowed, and everyone would have to slog their asses to get back, no time for playing politics. And if you think the world will be the same again soon, let me remind everyone that according to Modi ji this is just the first cat out of the bag. The others are waiting desperately to come out and trick the balance rats. So we can all soon look forward to have more cats and no rats. No wonder everyone in the opposition is scrambling to somehow bell the first cat!
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