Mamta Says ‘Coup!’, Army Says ‘Kyu!?’

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“Post truth” has been declared as the word of the year. We Indians had no role in the decision-making process and feel seriously marginalized. So we have voluntarily taken up the responsibility of now making it the word of the decade or maybe even the Century. And headlining this project are Mamta Banerjee with Arvind Kejriwal. Mamtaji has started a campaign of trying to make the Indian public lose their mind. Its initial partial success in her home state has given her false hopes that she can easily replicate it for the whole of India, while Media channels like NDTV have found another opportunity to increase their TRPs and help her spread this infection to the rest of the country. But luckily even the virus has a mind of its own. The minute it moves out of Bengal and breathes in fresh air, it transforms itself to humor, surprise, disbelief, anger and much more but nothing near its original avatar of being mindless as seen these days in Bengal. Can there be anything more bizarre than the idea of the Indian Army planning a coup in the state of Bengal as well as collecting money at various toll plaza’s. The only grain of truth I can find in this claim is the reality of the Army being poor. They have been featured in the news lately for demanding pension parity in OROP and pay parity with their civilian counterparts in the recently concluded pay commission. I know Mamtaji must feel paranoid if she believes that they are doing it to fund the coup. Out of the seven command headquarters of the army, one is located in Calcutta. Despite their presence in the area for such a long time, they haven’t been successful in rubbing off any of their ideology on the existing civilian establishment. For them their country comes first, then their comrades, and only after that will they ever think of themselves. How ironical, on one side Mamtaji is agitated that the people in her home state don’t have cash and on the other they are paying the army to fund a coup. I am sure they must be giving it through checks or through mobile wallets, which they have quickly adapted to, while she was spending time in Delhi, agitating. I can only say this, and with great conviction, that millions of Army personnel both serving and retired have been able to see through this post-truth politics being generated at their behest. I am also in awe of how easily Mamtaji has been able to educate so many on her brand of politics, in fact this is the best hit in the arm the ruling party has managed to get against the opposition till date, without even moving a finger.

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Lets Keep ‘Look’-ing For What Matters!

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How can you fool the police? Very easy, become one of them. That is how some terrorists could enter the jail to help their colleagues escape, fooling the Punjab Police. Is it so easy or does it have something to do with the Punjab Police itself. If you are thinking about the competence of Police, no I did not mean that, I have no doubt that they are as equally competent as any of their counterparts in India. What I’m talking about is their appearance. Have you ever noticed how similar all Punjab police personnel are? To make you notice that, let me take your memories to the only Sikh news anchor of NDTV, Amitoj Singh. What makes him stand out is his turban color coordinated with all his other pieces of clothing. Otherwise if you cover yourself all over with clothes and what ever little is left with hair, how can you be differentiated! Of course, you would say there is also the question of physical features. Notice again this doesn’t work so well with Punjab Police either. The image comes to your mind when you think of them is high(tall), hairy, hefty, etc……… Now imagine how easy it would have been for terrorists to imitate them, with similar clothes, hair and also the turban. I can validate my claim further, have you seen the most notorious of this lot of terrorists who escaped, if not ,then you need to rewind or see a old newspaper clipping. Not realizing the consequences and thinking he will differentiate himself, he got his beard and hair cut. But this is what made it so easy to recognize him and he landed back to the place he ran from ! Though I know, many might want to discard my theory as absurd, because then we’ll have to settle the problem of who takes credit for the arrest. Having said all this, please don’t think this is always a disadvantage. Have you ever seen a Sunny Deol movie. He has always preferred to be casted in the role of a Punjab police officer, before he flies to a foreign land chasing what his job demands. There, what gives him a disadvantage in his homeland turns to a visible advantage. He is the only one visible everywhere, even when playing a cameo. Even Daniel Craig can suffer from a case of mistaken identity in a James Bond movie, but not him. When the world proudly says that an Indian with a turban can be found everywhere, it is because his appearance which really makes him stand out.